Of course, it has been more than just a bad day. And I’m definitely not fine. In fact, I’ve not been fine for a while now. Traumatised of homies. Taught to be rude and selfish, because being ‘good’ to the globe is just not worth it. Deprived of love. Problems are too many. Solutions are scanty. Truth is cruel and avoided. Sexuality talks are below-the-bench topics. Corruption is in the veins. The idea of superiority over recessive beings is dominant. Society is very judgmental and conservative. Life is plain ‘weird’…. I use that phrase when I’m lacking word.
I’m sick of the system. Distractions have turned necessities now. Loving is a crime. World is moving in the speed of light. ‘Moving on’ isn’t easy. Frequent fights and continuously battling for a say in the community is now being creepy. War isn’t far. We trust and faith, so that they are broken. We hope and dream high, so that they get shattered. Being a teenager isn’t hard; it’s just ‘Weird’. This is ‘in-between’ phase of life… The concept of humanity and its existence is highly questionable, by me.
Luck is hoax. Life takes everyone places. Probably it was decided, the journey I’m allowed to, is to a place named ‘Hell’… Where peace is a fiction .. And hypothetical, idealistic views are meant to be achieved. Thousands of unanswered questions sooth help. Internet seem like a great solution, but unfortunately access to that, in my life is seized. Words are in fact too tame to explain my situation.
Nothing I ever did, with my fullest, was acceptable by my folks. I’m not saying that I am giving up on it. The battle will continue. Till success. Friendship, Love, and care – are too strong words. Stranger-ship is the best. It has no expectations, no hopes, no fake promises, no unwritten rules to follow. It’s beautiful. Maybe my brain is wired differently, or maybe it’s all normal. Swollen, reddish, painful… pain, scar, bruises, bloody wounds. It looks like two worlds split up and their inner senses showing its own true self. Beautiful sight of glossy blackish-red, liquidly, thick substance spurting out. Hot like lava. Like world was made, to be split. I sometimes realise that, I’m crapping. Like.. Inner thoughts aren’t exactly meant to be released, right? So absurd. x3 My life, like those wounds, split itself. …. Juggling thoughts ’bout life and death. Too much analytic, overthinking. Wish I wasn’t so sensitive. I keep doing many random experiments and researches.. I was recently trying to know myself a bit. I found 80% of the people who are sensitive, are empathetic. I overthink. I’m stronger than I look. I talk more with my body language. And my silence isn’t rudeness. It’s just my personal space. I get bored easily. Finally, I’m emotional and fall for people too easily.. I’m crapping a lot. Anyways… Life is Love. So just smile and accept the reality the way it is.